That Time Congress Must Have Gotten the Staff of Funny or Die to Name Their New Healthcare Bill

There’s been a lot of talk back and forth over what will the Republican lead congress do in finally fulfilling their 6 year crusade to get rid of Obamacare.  

What will their replacement plan look like? Will they even have a replacement plan?

I’m sure a lot of people thought the replacement plan would resemble the one depicted in this cartoon from The New Yorker.

But just when it seemed people were panting and howling with anticipation at knowing the future of healthcare in America, suddenly Republican Congressman Pete Sessions of Texas dropped this on us like Metallica/Lou Reed crossover album.

BEHOLD!  The possible replacement to Obamacare.

Yup, you read right.  He literally called it “World’s Greatest Healthcare Plan of 2017”.  Now if that title doesn’t scream practical joke, I don’t know what does. 

I had to doublecheck the url to make sure I didn’t accidentally land on a page of The Onion.  Nope it’s legit.

You gotta wonder what was going on in Pete Sessions’ mind when he came up with it.  Was he looking to troll the political process?  Did he lose a bet?  Was he drunk?

World’s Greatest Healthcare Plan of 2017.  That sounds like the kind of name for something that a guy comes up with and then immediately jacks off to the thoughts of his own awesomeness.  

Some might say it’s the political equivalent of a someone busting out a pompous, 10 minute, hair metal style, guitar solo in the middle of a hardcore punk band show.

Or some might say it’s the political equivalent of a first time filmmaker squeezing like 30 separate homages to Quentin Tarantino in his first feature film script and thinking he’s a unique genius for doing it.

I have an alternate idea… 

I suspect that Pete Sessions didn’t actually come up with the name.  I bet he was struggling to come up with something.  He didn’t want to call it something dry and monotonous.  So he called a friend, who emailed a friend, who whatsapped a friend that he heard was “good with coming up with stuff.”  That friend, just happened to  be a staff writer for Funny or Die and he was like “I got the perfect name for this bill.”

What makes me go with that theory?  Simple.  Its resemblance to the recurring bit on Funny or Die that always wins the internet, The Best Gifs of All Time of the Week.

In an year where the President’s inauguration speech is equal parts rip off of Avatar monologue and The Bee Movie monologue, this can’t be a mere coincidence.  There has to be Funny or Die connection.

Now some of you might say, “what if he didn’t get a writer from Funny or Die? It’s possible that he might have been a fan of that recurring bit as well.”

Yeah, that’s a possibility.  But let’s be honest, look at this guy…

This guy isn’t going to Funnyordie.com.  He looks like the kind of guy whose only connection with the internet is yelling at his Secretary “hey Martha, go on that Google thing on the computer and order my wife up a nice something for my anniversary.”

Do you agree?  Do you think I’m way off?  Let me know in the comments section and follow True Anecdotal for more stories, observations, and anecdotes.

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